Still as lovely as ever...

Wow I used to think I was going to do this daily. I forgot it existed. Five years later - still have sleep issues.

I'm so tired.

I like this song. I only recently knew the name. I heard it in a show - the greatest show of all time a la New York Magazine. They always had the best music. This song played for a few seconds during an episode, then only faintly in the background. Try as I did to Shazam, it was just enough to tease me without enough to even google the audible 3 words. But now I love it.

The show, obviously, is Gossip Girl. The song is called "Names in Vain" by Summons. Sheck it out!

Video with Lyrics!


You like that, right?

Anyway. I thought it might be interesting to play with this a bit.

Maybe I'll be a famous blogger one day. That's what I'll do. It's done!

Donald Trump is currently POTUS. That's literally the first thing that came to mind when I was thinking how things have changed since I last wrote. I've moved cities multiple times, people I once thought would be in my life forever, aren't. I have just a ghost memory of our friendship, faint and fleeting. Job change. Milestone birthday. A niece that didn't exist yet. So much. Yet the one thing that sticks out, as something I would tell Past Lena is that Donald Trump will eventually be President Donald Trump.

~Orange will be the new Black and kiddo, your future is orange anyway~

So anyway, I say anyway a lot. I think it's time for a glass of wine. I'm keeping the font like this because duh, Halloween and ON WEDNESDAYS WE WEAR BLACK (YESS I KNOW IT IS THURSDAY). But it was an accident. I was just trying to make the font normal and not orange anymore. Mr. Robot (one of my newest obsessions) would be ashamed. My world really is orange!😱😱

Flashing.....*lights* lights* lights* lights*

I look up and I look down and I look all the way around. They are there when I close my eyes. They persist when I stop to cry. Can't pretend, even if I try. Denying them would be a lie. That's why I stare out way up high. Still looking for an answer why.
I need to leave, but don't know where. These circumstances are too unfair. I'm still under a spell. You don't know me very well. But I can't make myself care. This is why I sit and stare. Don't try. Don't even dare.

The best side and worst side of everybody you have ever known. It's disheartening. 

Jamming TPR. I don't like that Jenny Humphrey knows me so well. 

I'm not listening to you,
I am wandering right through existence.
With no purpose and no drive,
In the end we're all alive, alive.

2000 years I've been awake,
Waiting for the day to shake.


Dear all of you who've wronged me,
I am, I am a zombie.
Again, again you want me to fall on my head.
I am, I am, I am a zombie,
How low, how low, how low will you push me?
To go, to go, to go, before I,
Lie down dead.

Blow the smoke right off the tubes,
Kiss my gentle burning bruise,
I'm lost in time.
But to all the people left behind,
You are walking dumb and blind.
Blind.

For 2000 years I've been awake,
Waiting for the day to shake.


Dear, all of you who've wronged me,
I am, I am a zombie.
Again, again you want me to fall on my head.
I am, I am, I am a zombie,
How low, how low, how low will you push me,
To go, to go, to go, before I,
Lie down dead.
I'm dead, I'm dead, I'm dead.

To all of you who wronged me,
I am, I am a zombie
Again, again you want me to fall on my head.
I am, I am, I am, a zombie,
How low, how low, how low, will you push me,
To go, to go, to go, before I,
Lie down dead? - Zombie (The Pretty Reckless)

Paul said whaaaat the fu-

This seriously is the lamest bullcorn ever. EVER.  But it's cool.

smith.

Tomorrow is going to be the most boring day of my life. I'm so glad I enjoy reading. I'm not glad that I'm easily distracted and probably won't make any progress in the book I choose to take. Adult A.D.H.D., some people call it. It's really just an amazing ability to multi-task. I'm doing tens of things right now, as I write this.
I'm going to futilely try to go to sleep, because the only thing worse than an insanely bored Lena is an insanely bored and exhausted Lena.

I lied.

It seems I do not have insomnia.

Oh.my. I've been waiting and waiting and talking about True Blood since last season ended last summer. Granted, this weekend was rough and I got like 5 hours of sleep. So I leave the beautiful hotel that held the Wedding Fair 2012, and it may only be around 5 pm but I am ready to collapse. So after an annoyingly hot drive back home (45 minutes with my car claiming it is 103 degrees outside) I'm like, crawling to my townhouse. It's only 6ish...of course I have time for a quick nap! Somehow my quick nap turned into 10 hours and I MISSED IT. I have not seen the first episode of Season 5 of TB. Who am I? How did I let this happen? 

I did not attend my own True Blood party.

And apparently no one else did, either. My shirt still hangs in the closet. No signs of forced entry. My phone has dozens of missed texts and calls. It's ok to be disappointed in me, my friends, for I am disappointed too.

I have learned a lesson this morning. Several, actually.

1. Despite my attempt to remove all electronics from my bedroom, my phone must stay in there, even if just on the charger.
2. I am not an insomniac. Clearly I sleep when I need to. The rest of it is just more hours in the day for me :)
3. Always bring a change of clothes after working an event like the Wedding Fair. I would have rather drove home in a swim suit, and I am not stingy with the air. I max and full blast it.
4. My car windows must be tinted TODAY. I've had it for over a month now. Procrastination is not my friend.
5. Never rely on your internal body clock. It will let you down at the most crucial of moments. 
6. Engaged women are the most insane, selfish, self-centered, maniacal narcissists I've ever had the pleasure to meet. Whoever coined the phrase "Bridezilla" did not give these beeeeoootches justice.

True Blood Season 5: Trailer #2

QOTM - ~ With insomnia you're never really asleep, but you're never really awake either~ Narrator, Fight Club.

A tic-toc thing. Tic toc, doc. This is why I'm leaving weirdo San Antonio. There is nothing here for those of us who need a light for the night.
READ- A clean, well-lighted place by Ernest Hemingway. I'm sleeping less and less, and more randomly at that. But I like it.

Source: polyvore.com via Lena on Pinterest

This is the beginning. I've a lot to say. be back sooon.....